Daily Worship

Create within me a clean heart

Lily Cathcart December 07, 2020 0 4
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Psalm 51: 10 (NRSVA)

10 Create in me a clean heart, O God,
    and put a new and right spirit within me.

How clean is my heart God?
Is it blackened with cruel things I thought to do and shrivelled by cruel things people have said?
Is it broken by anger and grief-cracked by doubt and uncertainty, crawling with jealousy and pride?
Has it been stolen by misplaced love and admiration, by things I wanted and couldn’t have?
Do I have a heart at all God?

Wait, I think I see it.

It’s that small thing in the corner of my chest bruised but beating.
It may be charred but it is colourful too, a different colour for every good word I have ever spoken or heard. I didn’t know such colours existed.
Here it is sewn together by encouragement and there knitted together by acts of love.
I can see a golden line of faith branching into a tree, the leaves waving as my heart beats on.
And here, oh I can hardly believe it but it must be true.
Despite everything the door is still open.

PRAYER:

God of my heart
Thank you that you hold it in your hands no matter how it looks and feels.
No matter how unclean parts of it are.
Help me to tip the balance of my heart towards the good, faithful and true parts of me.
As we approach Christmas in this time of worry and loneliness keep my heart’s door open, help me to fling it wide to you.
Amen.