I’ve talked to hundreds of bereaved people in my life, I guess it’s my job as a pastor. You know its a great privilege to be brought into a family and be allowed to share in their grief.
One thing I’ve noticed that many people seem to have in common is a feeling of restlessness. You don’t notice it the first visit you make, but you do the second visit. The truth is often its difficult to get anyone in. You knock the door no one answers. The car has gone from the driveway. Restlessness has started.
It seems to display itself in so many different ways. I knew a man who thought he was going mad. He would find himself out driving in the car at 2am. He would be up cleaning the house in the wee small hours. He couldn’t settle.
I was able to tell him he wasn’t going mad he was simply grieving. Grief takes many forms. Often we just don’t want to think about what has happened. Keeping on the move kind of shields you from the reality you have to face at home. You know Jesus said some amazing words to people who felt restless. He said, “Come unto me all of you who are heavy laden and I will give you rest”
Rest is such a wonderful experience. It’s not easy carrying a heavy load. The inference is that Jesus knows how to take the weight off the troubled heart. I guess that’s why I suggested finding a place where you can reflect and pray. Such a place can become an important factor in helping to bring about putting your mind at rest.
Setting your mind at rest is not any easy thing to do. One quite obvious way is to start playing music. It quite amazing the calming effect music can have on a restless heart. Getting out and breathing fresh air and doing a bit of walking also helps to balance out this restlessness.