Daily Worship

Fractures form

Laura Digan March 28, 2024 4 2
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Listen to this daily worship

John 13: 18-30 (NRSVA)

18 I am not speaking of all of you; I know whom I have chosen. But it is to fulfil the scripture, “The one who ate my bread has lifted his heel against me.” 19 I tell you this now, before it occurs, so that when it does occur, you may believe that I am he. 20 Very truly, I tell you, whoever receives one whom I send receives me; and whoever receives me receives him who sent me.’

21 After saying this Jesus was troubled in spirit, and declared, ‘Very truly, I tell you, one of you will betray me.’ 22 The disciples looked at one another, uncertain of whom he was speaking. 23 One of his disciples—the one whom Jesus loved—was reclining next to him; 24 Simon Peter therefore motioned to him to ask Jesus of whom he was speaking. 25 So while reclining next to Jesus, he asked him, ‘Lord, who is it?’ 26 Jesus answered, ‘It is the one to whom I give this piece of bread when I have dipped it in the dish.’ So when he had dipped the piece of bread, he gave it to Judas son of Simon Iscariot. 27 After he received the piece of bread, Satan entered into him. Jesus said to him, ‘Do quickly what you are going to do.’ 28 Now no one at the table knew why he said this to him. 29 Some thought that, because Judas had the common purse, Jesus was telling him, ‘Buy what we need for the festival’; or, that he should give something to the poor. 30 So, after receiving the piece of bread, he immediately went out. And it was night.

Judas speaks:

“I had believed in Jesus, I was there when he healed people, performed miracles. I knew he had power. I really thought he was the Messiah, the one who would free us from the Roman occupation. 

I thought he was up for radical action, especially when he called out the religious leaders on their hypocrisy. And the people believed. There was a movement behind him. The people were ready to be mobilised. They were hungry for change, desperate even. I had the connections and could have made it happen, if only he had said the word. 

But Jesus didn’t seem to get it, he didn’t realise that with his power we could start the revolution. Three years I’d been involved and he still hadn’t capitalised on his popularity and taken advantage of his power. 

I admit I grew impatient and got fed up with his dithering. I was fed up with his talk of love and forgiveness. I didn’t get it. Prioritise, Jesus, I thought, you can teach on this all you want once you free us from these Romans. 

I stopped listening to him. 

I’ve decided to take actions into my own hands. 

If I engineer his arrest the people will revolt. That is my plan. His arrest will start a revolution that will overthrow the Romans. 

He knows something is going to happen. 

He knows, I am sure of it. 

 

He passes me the bread and he tells me to do it.”

 

Prayer:

 

Forgive me Lord, when I tune out your voice

Forgive me Lord, when I stop reading your word

Forgive me Lord, when I fail to understand your plan

Forgive me Lord, when I think I know best

Forgive me Lord when I exclude you

Forgive me Lord my self-deception

Forgive me Lord, for I don’t know what I’m doing

Amen